Porch Geraniums

It was a beautiful spring day and I did a tiny bit of gardening. We
usually don't like to plant too many flowers before Mother's Day,
because it has proven too tempting in the past to some looking for a
gift for their mom.

Hypothetical Question -- Which One Food Would You Choose?

You suddenly become allergic to all food to the point of death. Your doctor tells you this is very expensive to cure. They can only afford medicine to allow you to eat one food. You must choose the one food that you will eat for the rest of your life. Eating any other food will cause a painful death. It can be any food because they would add the needed nutrients to whatever food you choose in a way that doesn't alter the taste. What is the one food you would choose to eat for the rest of your life?

For me, this would be an easy choice. It would be McDonald's Triple Thick Chocolate Milkshake. Is there anything sadder than hearing the slurp of the last bit of a McD's milkshake mixing with the air at the bottom of the cup as you desperately move the straw to suck every drop? I think I could happily eat nothing else for the rest of my life. I know they are bad for you, but I have to treat myself once in awhile.

In case you weren't sure how bad they are for you, Men's Health magazine recently did an article about the worst fast foods and they named the McDonald’s Large Triple Thick Chocolate Milkshake as the worst milkshake. The article went on to say you would be better off ordering two Quarter Pounders than downing this gut-busting shake. They suggest ordering the reduced-fat ice cream cones as a much, much healthier choice. Sorry. The cones don't compare to the heavenly goodness of the shakes.

Tell me what your one food would be to eat for the rest of your life?

Sometimes Being a Bitch Is All a Woman Has to Hang Onto

Judy Parfitt was amazing as Vera Donavon in the movie, Dolores Claiborne. This clip is a well-deserved tribute to her. This clip and many others are always available on the sidebar of this blog.

Weatherman Predicts High Pressure Front in his Pants

Though my sense of humor has not graduated the sixth grade, I really do feel bad for this guy. I love how he leaves the shot one way and has to franically run back the other. Check out Failblog.org for more examples of people being human.

Random Thoughts -- Teabaggers, Taxes, Chimp Photos, the Lottery, and Movies

Today, there will be a bunch of protests against taxation WITH representation. These people are basically just sore losers and whiny. I love how MSNBC constantly refers to them as teabaggers. The only people with a legitimate gripe are the people in DC who have to pay taxes and actually have no voting representation in the government.

Speaking of taxes, we already got our refund. Yea! I know Suze Orman would scold us for not having enough deductions and getting a healthy refund each year, but I think it is a good way for us to actually save some money.

I wonder how long before the National Enquirer or the Weekly World News or an organization of that caliber get hold of the sealed photos of the chimp victim. I bet they will be published somewhere eventually.

I’ve decided to stop buying lottery tickets. I know that someone has to win, but the odds are that it won’t be me. The odds are even lower now that I’m not playing. Take a look at the crowd at a baseball stadium, where there may be 20,000 people. Out of just that many people, what is the actual likelihood of being the one person out of all them to win something? Now, multiply all the people in that stadium by 4,000 baseball stadiums filled with 20,000 people.

I’m looking forward to Grey Gardens on HBO this weekend. It looks really good to me.

I haven’t been to the movies in weeks, and there isn’t any movies out that I’m interested in seeing. Doubt was the last one we saw. Since we got our 50-inch plasma TV, we enjoy staying home and watching movies. Milk is next on our Netflix, but I can never remember to send the discs back.

Burger King Ad Offensive ?

Burger King has a hot potato on its hands with its new whopper ad. According to the Associated Press, Mexico is protesting what it says is "a whopper of an insult."

An advertisement for Burger King's chili-flavored "Texican" burger that has run in Europe shows a small wrestler dressed in a cape resembling a Mexican flag. The wrestler teams up with a lanky American cowboy twice his height to illustrate the cross-border blend of flavors.

"The taste of Texas with a little spicy Mexican," a narrator's voice says.

It seems to me the ad is more of an insult to little people than Mexicans, but I also find the ad kinda gay. A cowboy answers an ad to live with a short professional wrestler. Nobody thought it would work out, but they seem to be living quite happily. They just need to add some small romantic touch, such as a hand on the thigh. Why not piss off the religious right while their at it and show a bedroom scene? The want ad does say one room.

New Yorker Cartoon Contest #189

The human porcupine gene is deeply recessive and very

rare, but I must warn you, when it does happen, the

births are quite painful and the children are not very popular.

Another Monday means another New Yorker Cartoon Contest. The caption under the cartoon is my very long entry. Click on the link above to enter your own caption. I'd love to hear some of your ideas.

The Endless Woods

In David McCullough's biography of John Adams, the author described Adam's wife, Abigail's trip from Boston to DC. He noted her description of the "endless woods" between Baltimore and Washington, meaning the last leg of the trip seemed endless and all there was to see was woods. The photo above was taken on the Baltimore-Washington Parkway, where there are still some woods left between the two cities. Even though I'm sure we ran into lots more traffic on our way to DC than Abigail had to endure, I'm sure we made much better time.

Easter Egg Rolling Backup

We ran into lots of traffic on our way back to DC after our Easter
celebration. We went to my sister's house about an hour north of
Baltimore.

Raising Chloe from the Dead, aka Heimliching My Dog

What better day than Easter to talk about a resurrection of sorts. Back in March, I posted the complete list of the 100 Facts about Me, and number 7 was that I performed the Heimlich Maneuver on my dog. The dog's name was Chloe and above is a watercolor of her that was done by my friend Elaine.

I got Chloe at an animal shelter in 1995 when she was about 4 months old. The incident took place during the second night I had her. It was in the middle of the night and I heard a noise that woke me up. I turned on the light and saw Chloe near my bed unconscious. I nudged her and she didn't wake up. I picked her up and she as limp as a rag.

I looked down her throat, but did not see anything. I stuck my finger down there deep and could feel something hard, but could not reach far enough to get a hold of it. I knew she had been chewing on a piece of rawhide, so I held her upside down and squeezed her stomach.

I was panicking at this point. I only had her for a few days, but I couldn't believe this was happening. Suddenly, out came the slimy rawhide and the next think I knew, she was looking at me and walking around like nothing happened. Needless to say, she never was given rawhide pieces to chew ever again.

Chloe lived 11 more years. We had to have her put to sleep in 2006, and as far as I know, she is still dead.

"He's Alive!" by Dolly Parton -- Happy Easter!

Although I'm an atheist, I do recognize good music and an amazing performance. This is one of my favorite Dolly tunes. This is from one of those country music awards shows in 1989. I remember seeing this live on TV and also remember seeing the shots of the audience after the song giving a prolonged standing ovation and close-ups of audience members wiping away tears. This version cuts off at the beginning of the ovation. I have to admit that the song gives me goosebumps. It is very theatrical.

Happy Easter!

Raining in Baltimore by Counting Crows

I love this song and I couldn't find an official video, but I did find this that someone made with black and white photos that provides a very literal interpretation of the lyrics. It is a rainy, gloomy day in DC, but at least it is a Saturday and a day off. I hope this doesn't make you too depressed.

7 pm Update: Since I posted this, the sky cleared up and the sun came out. It turned out to be a beautiful afternoon!

"Who Will Love Me As I Am?" from Side Show

I didn't get to see the Broadway version of Side Show in 1997. I saw a Signature Theater production in 2000, which was amazing. Signature Theater is a local theater in Arlington, VA, which has put on some high-quality musical theater.

Side Show tells the true story of the conjoined twins Daisy and Violet Hilton who made their living appearing in circus freak shows. They also starred in the movies Freaks! This is a photo of the pair from that movie.

If you want to read about their later years and death, follow this link.

What I love about this song featured in the show is how it relates to anyone who feels like an outcast. I didn't come out until I was in my 30s. I was afraid of not being accepted by the people I loved. I think lots of gays can relate to this song. Anyway... I like it.

The clip above is from The Rosie O'Donnell Show and features Alice Ripley and Emily Skinner. This clip is another that is always featured on my sidebar in favorite Broadway Shows. There are clips from all my favorites.

Washington Post Style Invitational Week 812: Rx-Rated Humor

If you hiccup, blink and urinate at the same time,

your bellybutton will switch from an innie to an outie.

This week's Washington Post Style Invitational challenge is to come up some "false medical or physiological fact," like the example above by Andrea Kelly. The artwork is by Bob Staake.

As always, the winner gets the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place winner gets "a fabulous book of paper dolls of 'George H. Bush and His Family,' dated 1990 and featuring pictures of many family members, including a youthful-looking George W. and little-girl granddaughters Jenna and Barbara." It goes on to describe W. wearing only a T-shirt and his tighty whiteys. Ewwww.

Go to the link above for specific on entering. If I come up with something, I'll post it here. Let me know if you have any ideas too.

Chicken Keeping Too Complicated? There's a Magazine for That!

We went to the Barnes and Noble recently and took a gander at the magazine rack. Good Lord! It looks like everyone who has lost their jobs in the bad economy has decided to start a magazine. There are magazines on any and everything. I would imagine that Hobby Farm magazine isn't exactly flying off the shelf in the DC metropolitan area, but I could see where it might have some appeal nationwide.

Flying Disc magazine, on the other hand, seems to be quite a niche market. I would love to sit in on their editorial meetings and listen to them pitch ideas for articles. How about another article on disc golf? Jeez, we covered that in the last six issues. Do we have any more photos of dogs catching discs?

Now, there are lots of magazines related to horses. This one was the oddest I saw. I guess there is a sport that centers around shooting things while on a horse. I would think this would scare the bejesus out of the horse, but I suppose they get used to it. I'm sure they have lots of confused readers that must think that the horse is doing the shooting, which explains the cover photo. Another thing, doesn't that horse look a little lopsided?

This is my nomination for the most boring magazine ever. Oh Joy! My new issue of Watch Time is finally here. Don't these people know about porn?

We're Not Talking Raindrops On Roses or Whiskers on Kittens

I realize it is a bit self-indulgent to do a blog entry on your favorite things. I'm not Oprah after all. Who cares what my favorite things are, but this is my blog and it is all about me. Basically, just having a blog is self-indulgent, so why not go the whole 9 yards?

I'll start with food. I love cinnamon! For breakfast this morning I had Post Honey Bunches of Oats Cereal with Cinnamon Clusters.

I had it everyday this week in fact. I love this cereal. There is just something about cinnamon that floats my boat. I remember as a child making cinnamon toast, which consists of regular toast with butter covered in a sugar/cinnamon mixture. It is awesome. I need to make that again and soon. My favorite candy is Hot Tamales. When I have a big box, I will eat them until I am sick. I cannot stop. It seems I love anything with cinnamon, but the best thing is French toast. Actually, I love almost any food that is red -- and by red, I don't mean apples or tomatoes, but things with red dye, such a fruit punch-flavored sodas and cherry or strawberry-flavored candies. This includes any red jelly bean, Starbursts, Twizzlers, etc. I could live on artificially red thing and die a happy man.

If Iowa Can Do It, Why Not Here In DC?

What with all the news about Vermont yesterday and Iowa last week, I totally missed the big news in my own backyard. The D.C. Council voted to recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states. Of course yesterday's vote did not make it so. The council is expected to take a final vote on the legislation next month and it has to be approved by Congress, under Home Rule. It seems to me that Congress could be the big stumbling block here.

The council voted unanimously on the measure yesterday to recognize marriages performed outside of D.C. I'd be quite surprised it is approved by Congress. Even our progressive President says he is against same-sex marriage, so it is hard to see how Congress will approve such a law. The U.S. Congress isn't exactly as forward thinking as Sweden (or Vermont or even Iowa).

The article in today's Washington Post adds that D.C. Councilman David Catania plans on submitting legislation soon to legalize same-sex marriage for the District. Currently, D.C. does recognize domestic partnerships, but perhaps soon I could be a legally married man.

Interestingly, Shane and I haven't taken advantage of becoming domestic partners yet. We have wills and other legal documents that give us many of the rights that DP offers, but we haven't taken the time to get a DP yet. Maybe we'll be able to skip that step and just get married soon, if he'll have me.

Thank the VT Legislators that Voted for Equality

The Human Rights Campagin (HRC) is asking we thank the Vermont leaders that supported equality!

Vermont has become the first state in the country to enact marriage equality through its legislature! Not only that – it passed with a two-thirds majority!

The HRC is also warning that right-wing groups are about to slam the leaders who made this victory possible, in the hopes that they can intimidate legislators everywhere into opposing marriage equality.

All of us, across the country, must show our support. Send a thank-you note to the courageous leaders of the Vermont Legislature that made marriage equality possible – make sure they know, beyond a doubt, that they did the right thing. You can do just that by clicking here.

Horray for Love!! Horray for Iowa and Vermont!!

What could be gayer than Barbra and Judy singing a medley of songs about love? This is in honor of Iowa and Vermont passage of same-sex marriage. Horray for them!

Pass the Granola! Vermont Overides Veto!!!

By a vote of 100-49 the Vermont House of Representatives has overridden Gov. Jerk Douglas' veto! Marriage equality comes to Vermont! Vermont is the fourth state to approve same-sex marriage!!!! Vermont joins Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Iowa as the four states that permit marriage for everyone.

Of course, marriage and the basic rights that come with it are still not recognized or permitted on a Federal level, even in these four states, but let's not poo poo this important victory.

When states like Iowa start seeing the light, we can only hope the rest of the country will come to their senses.

Way to go Vermont!!!

Take Action! Contact These VT Legislators Now!

The vote to override the Vermont veto of same-sex marriage occurs today. Contact these Democrats that voted AGAINST S.115 (We need their support to override the veto) We just need to convince a few more Democrats to do the right thing.

Kenneth Atkins, D-Winooski kwa138@aol.com (802) 655-1280

Sonny Audette, D-South Burl. (802) 862-4236

Clem Bissonnette, D-Winooski clembi@comcast.net (802) 655-9527

Cynthia Browning, D-Arlington cynthiab@sover.net (802) 375-9019

Tim Corcoran, D-Bennington tcorcoran@leg.state.vt.us (802) 447-0929

Michel Consejo, D-Sheldon mconsejo@wildblue.net (802) 524-0305

Debbie Evans, D-Essex ekevans@aol.com (802) 878-4317

Richard Howrigan, D-Fairfield (802) 827-6513

David Potter, D-Clarendon shadmtn@msn.com (802) 438-5385

Robert South, D-St. Johnsbury vtrepsouth@gmail.com (802) 748-0873

Jeff Young, D-St. Albans City jeffeyoung@yahoo.com (802) 524-5284

The vote is today! Take action now!

Getting Angry Baby?

I love this movie! It is Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf. This clip and others from my list of favorite movies are located on the side of my blog, along with favorite Broadway shows, TV series and books (I don't have clips from the books though). Each movie listed has a clip -- either a scene from the film or the preview. I don't usually like watching movies multiple times, but this is one that I can watch over and over. This is by far Taylor's best performance and even more amazing considering she was in her early 30s when she played Martha.

Gun Owners Most Likely to Die from Suicide

The recent shootings at a civic center in Binghamton, NY, the police killings in Pittsburgh, and the father that killed his five kids in Washington state got me to thinking that maybe the U.S. has too many guns. I went over to the Nation Rifle Association (NRA) website to get some consolation. I was shocked to find people advocating for less restrictive gun laws. That didn’t seem to make any sense. Are they crazy? It turns out that yes, they are in fact, crazy.

I was amazed to find that one of the arguments for less gun control by the NRA included a story about the recent mass murders in Australia (where there is tight gun control). Their point was that the Australian mass murderers didn’t use guns to kill lots of people, but fire. Because some crazy people set massive fires, the NRA crazy people thought that justified not imposing gun controls because murderers will still kill people. And who wouldn’t want to be shot to death rather than burned to death? You have to love their logic.

But what are the facts? The statistics below are from the Brady Campaign website.

Gun Deaths and Injury - The United States Leads the World in Firearm Violence

In 2005, 30,694 people in the United States died from firearm-related deaths – 12,352 were murdered; 17,002 killed themselves; 789 were accidents; 330 died by police intervention, and in 221, the intent was unknown.

An additional 71,417 people were shot and survived their injuries -- 52,748 people injured in an attack; 3,190 people injured in a suicide attempt; 14,678 people shot accidentally, and 801 people shot in a police intervention.

In 2004, firearms were used to murder 56 people in Australia (not including the 173 people that died in the bushfires who would have preferred to have been shot, according to the NRA), 184 people in Canada, 73 people in England and Wales, 5 people in New Zealand, and 37 people in Sweden. In comparison, firearms were used to murder 11,344 in the United States (the number of bushfire murders is not know at this time in the U.S.).

In 2006, there were only 154 justifiable homicides by private citizens using handguns in the United States.

We have this argument in my very own house regularly. Shane wants to have a gun for protection, and I know that one night when I can’t sleep and I’m wondering around the house in the dark, he will wake up and shoot me thinking I’m a prowler. We don’t have a gun and we will not be getting one.

If I had just a nickle for every dead body that resulted from guns each year in the U.S., in 2005 I would've had $1,534.70. That's a lot of nickles.

New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #188

Remember folks, it's a goldfish bar, so don't be koi.

This is the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest cartoon for this week. Click on the link to enter. That's my entry under the cartoon. Let me know if you come up with any captions also.

The Beloved Sing the Sun Rising -- Another Great Running Song

Here's another one of my favorite songs to listen to while running.  The beat on this one is infectious. 

Style Invitational Week 811 -- Rock-Bottom Lines

This week's challenge at the Washington Post Style Invitational is to come up with a sign that would indicate that the economy couldn't get worse.

The example they came up with is this: McMansions still lie vacant, but crowds gather at the grand opening of HooverVillas on the Potomac.  (Get it?  I guess you have to be familiar with Hoovervilles from the Depression.)

Winner gets the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives a Nunchuck, which is not one half of a pair of nunchucks but a junky little toy consisting of a trigger-activated thing that "catapults nuns up to 15 feet!" -- the nuns being four tiny nun-shaped objects with their hands in the air. Warning: The package specifies that it is "not suitable for children under 3 years"; presumably it's okay for children 3 and older to shoot toy nuns.

For more information on entering, click on the link above.

Here's one idea from me:

Suze Orman's new book is a how-to guide on suicide. 

Let me know if you have any ideas.

Life is Wonderful by Jason Mraz

You may have noticed I'm a big fan of Jason Mraz.  This is a great song to run with.  

Cherry Blossoms Galore! Dragging My Mom Around the DC Tidal Basin

My mom came down on the train for the weekend, so I dragged her down to the Tidal Basin to see the Cherry Blossoms.  It was a crazy windy day.  Also, my mom is 71 years old with bad knees and hips.  We walked all the way around the Tidal Basin, which is about a 2 mile walk in my estimation.  Here are a few photos and a short video from the trek taken with my new camera. 

Sweden Approves Same-Sex Marriage Legislation!

Yesterday, the Swedish parliament approved legislation that will make that country the seventh in the world to grant full marriage equality rights to all citizens, including same-sex couples. The other six countries that have same-sex marriage are South Africa, Canada, Spain, the Netherlands, Norway, and Belgium. The new legislation is to take effect as of May 1, and replaces the legislation approved in 1995 that allows same-sex couples to form a union in Sweden via registered partnership.

At least there are some countries in the world enlightened enough to do what the United States cannot -- provide equal rights to all their citizens. It is ironic that one of the reasons this country was founded was for religious freedom and now religion is the main reason a large population are denied basic civil rights.

Shane and I went to Stockholm a few years back and in reading up on the country we found it very interesting that they don't really have that many bars just for the gays. There's a crazy concept. The gays and the straights go to the same bars and nobody cares. It isn't a big deal. Can you imagine? Try that concept in Buttcrack, Alabama.

We Haven't Given Up On Florida

We are still looking for a bargain deal to buy a house in Florida.
For instance, I found this one on-line that includes this pool. It is
a 3-bedroom, 2 bath home in Port Charlotte that is listed for
$109,000. I'm not sure I want a house with a pool though. I would
imagine it would be a pain to keep up, especially if we aren't there
that much. On the other hand, it would be nice to have a private
pool. It might be worth a look. $109K seems crazy low.

Doing My Part to Help the Economy

I did my taxes on Sunday, and we are getting some money back, so I decided since my digital camera died that I would buy a new one. I got a Sony Cyber-shot S950. It has is a 10.1 Mega pixel 4X zoom camera with face detection and SteadyShot (whatever that is). It also shoots video. I actually bought it yesterday. It was on sale at Best Buy for $129, not including tax and the 8 Gig memory stick I had to buy ($40). I've taken a few shots of stuff around the house, but haven't uploaded anything yet. I plan on getting some shots of the cherry blossoms this weekend. Stay tuned for some flowering tree shots up the wazoo.

Style Invitational Week 810 -- Homosexual Horse Breeding

This week's Washington Post Style Invitational is their annual contest to take two of the names of 100 of the horses eligible for the Triple Crown and come up with the name of their offspring. As in real life, the names cannot be longer than 18 characters, including spaces. Most of these horses are boys, but that is beside the point. It doesn't have to be a boy and a girl horse for the contest's sake. This is a progressive newspaper after all.

Here's the example they give: Giant Oak x Gluteus Maximus = Heck of a Trunk

Below is the list of the 100 Horse names. Click on the link above to enter. They ask that you limit your entries to 25 and double space. Please feel free to share any ideas you have here. Below are a few of my ideas -- Notice a pattern on most of these?

* Fast Draw x El Rapido = Premature Finisher
* Boyhood Dream x Mr. Fantasy = Dateline Special
* Gluteus Maximus x More than Willing = Bent Over
* Gluteus Maximus x Oil Man = Packing the Lube
* Gluteus Maximus x Stayonit = Saddle Sore
* Antitrust x Lyin Heart = Madoff with My Doe
* Old Fashioned x Red Wine = Bad Hangover
* Sullenburger x Empire State = Happy Landings

Abound
Action in May
Advice
Affirmatif
All the Bases
Andiron
Antitrust
Baryshnikov
Beethoven
Big Drama
Boyhood Dream
Bridging
Bunker Hill
Buzzin and Dreamin
Century Gold
Charitable Man
Checklist
Chocolate Candy
Clicker
Coffee Bar
Cribnote
Danger to Society
Desert Party
Dream Now
Driving Snow
Dunkirk
El Rapido
Empire State
Everyday Heroes
Fast Draw
Flat Out
Giant Oak
Gluteus Maximus
Gone Astray
Hello Broadway
Hold Me Back
I Want Revenge
Ice Road
Il Postino
In the Juice
Jack Spratt
Just Ben
Life Goes On
Logic
Lookn Mighty Fast
Lyin' Heart
Map of the World
Marquee Event
More Than Willing
Mr. Fantasy
National Monument
New York Baby
Nowhere to Hide
Oil Man
Old Fashioned
Omniscient
Parade Clown
Party Hard
Pauper's Prize
Pedestal
Pitched Perfectly
Platinum Van
Poltergeist
Precious Package
Presto Change O
Quarter Given
Red Spider
Red Wine
Remember Mike
Rendezvous
Retap
Right One
Right of Way
Rocket to the Moon
Rue
Sea Level
Shafted
Silver City
Sir Phenomenal
Skipadate
Sneak Peek
Snowmaster
Stayonit
Street Car
Sullenberger
Sumo
Sunday Sunrise
Sweat Shop
The Big Dunkin
They're Late
Tiz True
Tone It Down
Total Gentleman
Unionize
Wall Street Wonder
Wat
West Side Bernie
Wild Entry
Wise Kid
Zither Song

Cherry Blossoms Starting to Blossom in DC

This photo is from Saturday night when we were driving over to see
Archer and the Boyfriend. It was a misty, foggy evening, but the
cherry blossoms were starting to bloom on the Tidal Basin. They
should be out in full force this weekend, and the weather is supposed
to be nice by then. My mom and sister are coming for a visit to see
the flower spectacular this weekend. I'm sure there will be more
photos then. Stay tuned!

The Trent Austin Quintet -- LIVE -- Plays Freddie Hubbard

Last Friday night, we had quite a jazzy night. Shane's step-brother is the amazing trumpter, Trent Austin. He had a live show that was broadcast on Maine Public Radio, which we listened to via the computer. Trent took his quintet (tenor saxophone, guitar, bass and drums) to the Bangor, Maine, studio for a live tribute to the late, great Freddie Hubbard. Between songs, Trent was interviewed by the show's host. It was pretty cool. If you like good music, you'll love this. You can listen to the recording of the broadcast here (look for the March 27, 2009 link).

The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #187 -- Any Ideas?

?????

This is the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest cartoon for this week. Click on the link above to enter. I haven't thought of a caption for this one yet. Everything I have thought of so far involves the angel not wearing underwear, and I'm not sure that is the best way to go. Let me know if you come up with any captions and if its good, maybe I'll steal it. I wouldn't do that, really.

Our First Home

On our way home from getting our taxes done today, we drove by our
first house, in Kensington, MD. It doesn't look like the new owners
are keeping it up too well. The shutters and doors are still the same
color we painted them more than 10 years ago.

Taxing Sunday

Shane and I went to H&R Block to get our taxes done today. We were
worried about capital gains because we sold our vacation condo in
Florida last year. It didn't turn out too bad, thankfully. What did
turn into a problem was my taxes from last year. I had them done at
another H&R Block office, and they may have screwed them
up. They are still looking them over to make sure they get them right
this time.

Another Game Night with Archer and the Boyfriend

Saturday night was another game night with Archer (right) and the Boyfriend. The Boyfriend cooked a delicious chicken fettuccine Alfredo for dinner. Shane and I brought a chocolate cream pie for dessert. Of course, the wine flowed freely all evening. After dinner, we played Password and Trivial Pursuit. Archer and the B won the first game of Password, but Shane and I came back like gangbusters and won the next game and the Trivial Pursuit. Before we knew it, it was after midnight and time to go.

Funny Video of Dog Sleepwalking, Running, and Waking

Announcing a Death Can Be Funny on TV

I was reading the I Should Be Laughing blog this morning where Bob posted some of his fiction, and the story contained a scene where the characters were calling people and announcing a death. The subject made me think of a scene from the old Roseanne show that was one of the funniest scenes ever on a sitcom, which is the last 30 seconds of the clip above. I love Laurie Metcalf as Roseanne's sister. Also, check out Bob's blog and read his stuff. He's a great writer.

"Double Window" by Lou Messa

One of the few original works of art Shane and I have purchased is this piece we bought several years back. It is a watercolor by a Virginia artist named Lou Messa. I'm a huge fan of Andrew Wyeth, and this piece reminds me of his work. We bought it at an Annapolis gallery after visiting with it several times. There are few pieces Shane and I agree on, but this was one. Sorry the photo isn't the best quality, but it was taken with my iPhone. You can see the iPhone in the reflection of the glass in the photo.

Florida House Update

Earlier this week, I posted about a forclosed house we looked at in
Florida. I guess we weren't the only ones that thought that was a
good deal, because someone already has a contract on it. It is just
as well, as that house was very remote, and we need to save more money
before we buy a house. I have a feeling there will be other bargains
to be had in Florida down the road.

Subway Ad for God

You may recall that I posted a subway ad promoting atheism some time back. Today on the DC Metro, I saw the above ad promoting god. I thought the copy was kinda funny actually... Longing for something? A cheeseburger perhaps? No? How about an imaginary friend? That would be fulfilling! If there actually were a god, would this omnipotent being really need advertising to promote him? I guess someone thinks so. You do see an awful lot of people reading the bible on the subway. Maybe it's working.

Michael Jeter Delivers a Message in The Fisher King

I'm Anne Morrow Lindbergh -- I can't find my baby!

After hearing the news of Robin Williams having heart surgery recently, I started thinking about my favorite Robin Williams film, The Fisher King. Robin isn't actually in this scene, but the amazing Michael Jeter works his magic.

Get well soon Robin. Watching this should help.

Letter to VT Gov. Douglas: RE: Vetoing Gay Marriage

VT Gov. Jim Douglas will veto

the Vermont Gay marriage bill

because he is a dick.

I wrote an e-mail to Vermont Gov. Jim (Oliver Wendel) Douglas today after his announcement that he would veto the marriage bill that recently passed in the State Senate and is currently in the State House. In the subject line, I wrote: Friend of James Neiley. He is the 17-year-old who testified during a VT Senate hearing that I posted about earlier. Click here to e-mail Gov. Douglas also!

Govenor Douglas,

I was saddened to hear your announcement of plans to veto the gay marriage bill in Vermont. Since Vermont was the first state to allow civil unions for same-sex couples, it is unfortunate that it still has not taken the next step, like Mass and CT. You say you want the State government to concentrate on economic issues, but by vetoing this measure, you are just causing them to do additional work to override your veto. That doesn't make any sense, does it? Of course, you can't be in the Republican Party and do something as enlightened as permitting gay marriage. Don't be a bigot. Do the right thing. There is no reason that makes any sense to veto that bill. I urge you to reconsider your decision.

It's a Free Salad Day!

I work next door to a mall with a foodcourt. One of the food places
is a Salad Creations. Whenever I go there, I always get the Chopped
Veggie Salad Jr., with the spring mix lettuce, honey dijon fat-free
dressing and no artichokes. It is just under $6 and yummy. Also,
after you buy 9 salads, you get the 10th one free. This is my free
salad! To celebrate, I went to au bon pain and got a chocolate
croissant. You only live once!

Eloquent Argument for Gay Marriage by a High School Jr.

If you noticed someone getting a bit teary-eyed today at L' Enfant Plaza Metro Station, it was probably me. I was listening to my friend, Archer's, podcast (www.archerradio.com) on the way to work and he played the audio to this clip. It is of 17-year-old James Neiley from Charlotte, VT, testifying at a State Senate hearing on gay marriage for Vermont. I can't imagine being brave enough to do this at his age. What a great kid. I haven't heard a better arguement. I realize it is a long clip, but the testimony part is only the first half, which everyone should watch. The Vermont State Senate passed the gay marriage bill 26-4, sending it to the State House this week.

The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #186

Let my people go . . . to the China Hut for the most

delicious sweet and sour chicken this side of the Red Sea!

This is the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest cartoon for this week. My caption for this cartoon is above. Click on the link above to enter.

This caption is way too long and I don't think it is particularly original either or funny, so it has a good chance of winning. Other captions I was considering included:

"Have a Goldstone, Mr. Eggroll."

"With sin you get eggrolls."

"Having Kung Pao anywhere else is an abomination!"

"Thou Shall Not Double Dip the Duck Sauce."

This is why I'm not a comedy writer. Let me know if you come up with any captions too.

The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #184 -- Sort of Close

Unless you're selling chalk, we don't need any.

You might recall my caption for the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest cartoon from a couple weeks ago (#184), which is above. Each week they announce three finalists for people to vote on to determine which is the best caption. One of the finalists announced this week was, "Beat it, buddy. We're out of chalk." It was submitted by Paul Snare of University Place, Wash. I'd say I was getting close. OK... it isn't exactly the same, but we both mention chalk.

Insomnia Sucks Big Time

There is a saying in our house -- when Shane doesn't sleep, nobody sleeps.  

I have been having a bad time the last couple days with my sinuses.  I was hoping it was the high pollen count down in Florida and not a cold.  Anyway, my head is congested and I have a bit of a tickle in my throat causing me to cough a bit.  We went to bed at the regular time... around 11:15 or so.  At about 1:30, I woke up with a tickle again and had to cough a bit.  I drank a little water and Shane lifted his head, and said in a slightly panicked manner, "I can't sleep."  

He laid back down and tried again... moments later he was up and trying to turn on the fan over our bed.  Unfortunately, the wall switch was off and when he turned it on, the light came on.  We laid there some more with him tossing and turning.  I could see this was not going to work.  I was just listening for his sleep breathing and it never came.  Normally, he can fall asleep in about 30 seconds, but he was now in worry mode that he can't fall asleep and I was worrying about him falling asleep too.  Also, I have this thing that after I sleep, even for a short time, my body thinks I was just taking a nap and it is time to get up.  I soon realized I wasn't going to be sleeping anymore tonight.  I got up and took the laptop downstairs and began surfing the web.  

My head is still congested and I'm starting to think this is a cold, not just from pollen.  I hope Shane was able to finally get to sleep.  He was worried about a big writing project he needed to get completed by Wednesday.   We just need to get through this day and hopefully, we will sleep well tonight.  

We're Considering a Forclosed House Near Naples -- Are We Crazy?

Shane and I sold our condo on Fort Myers just over a year ago. On our way to the airport to fly back to DC today, we stopped to look at a 3 bedroom 2 bath house outside of Naples, FL, on 2.75 acres of land listed for $114K. I was hoping it would be a dump, so it wouldn't be a temptation. It actually looked pretty nice. Damn!

OK, the grass is dead, but it is very dry in SW Florida. It is a rural area, but there are some other nice houses in the neighborhood. Of course, one of the worse houses is right next door. There are LOTS of houses for sale in the area, as there are all over the State of Florida.

Shane is going to call to get more information. There may already be a contract on this for all we know. Anyway, there are many other houses for sale and I'm sure there are still plenty of bargains to be found if this one doesn't work out. It would have to be an amazing bargain for us to dive back into Florida real estate.

Below are some photos from today's exploration. As you can see, it is on a wooded lot and it is set back from the road. The back view looks back into woods. There is plenty of room for a pool someday.

Turtle Beach Day -- Me Like

This is what I looked at all day. I did go for a run and a dip in the
Gulf, but I spent most if the day in my beach chair looking at the
view. It was a very nice day.

Black Tongue Surprise

I have fallen off the eating right wagon this weekend, and as a result I had a bit of an upset stomach last night. Shane had a couple Pepto-Bismal tablets, so I took them. I felt better and slept pretty good. However, when I got up this morning, I was flabergasted to discover my tongue had turned black as coal overnight. It looked like a horrible fungus covering my tongue. I started brushing my tongue with my toothbrush until I was gagging to get the black off. It still isn't all gone. I Googled black tongue and Pepto and quickly learned this is a common side-effect. It is a scary and gross side-effect too.

I Like Turtle Beach

We're down in Florida this weekend, and today we drove around a bit
and did some shopping. We were scouting out some beaches to go to
tomorrow for the day. We went to Siesta Key, and found Turtle Beach.
It has everything we want -- clear water, white sand, parking, not too
crowded, and a bathroom relatively close by. The short time that we
were there today, we saw pelicans, dolphins, and a sting ray. The
weather is nice today and is supposed to be nice again tomorrow. We
are going to spend most of the day there. I can't wait! The photo above shows Shane wading in the surf.

Tammy Faye Is Reincarnated! Maybe?

We are spending a long weekend in Florida at Shane's mom's and this is
their Labradoodle, Lucy. Though it is hard to see in this photo, she
has the longest eyelashes I've ever seen on any living thing. And that is
without mascara! If she cried a lot, I would be certain she is the
reincarnated Tammy Faye, but she seems pretty happy.

Has the President Let Fame Go to His Head?

I stayed up late last night and watched a little bit of Jay Leno interview President Obama. The president got a little bit of flack when it was announced he would go on the Tonight Show. The gist of the comments were that he should be fixing the economy and not appearing on entertainment TV shows. There are also those who think he is doing too many things at once. Everyone has an opinion. Mine is that he is doing just fine.

The whole controversy reminded me of the campaign last year when the Republican talking points came up with the criticism that Obama is a celebrity. How could we elect a celebrity to be president (unless it was Ronald Reagan)? I do worry, however, that our president might let all this celebrity go to his head. So, I came up with some warning signs.

You Know President Obama Has Let Fame Go to His Head When He . . .

--Starts hanging out at the Playboy Mansion.

--Has the U.S. Mint issue an Obama dollar coin.

--Is named to star in the new Ocean's 14 movie.

--Leaves his wife for Angelina Jolie.

--Has the Pope kiss his ring.

--Guest stars on the VH1 show, I Love New York.

Let me know if you have any warning signs of your own.

DC Examiner Practices Ann Coulter Journalism

I ride the subway to work everyday and being the cheapskate I am I take one of the free newspapers offered at the top of the escalators at Eastern Market Metro. I always take the Express, produced by the Washington Post, and NEVER take the DC Examiner. The DC Examiner is Fox News with out the proclamation of fairness and the New York Post without the wacky headlines.

Today, the poor person hawking the Examiner had to stand in one of the most liberal cities in the country and try to give away papers with the above photo and headline hugely plastered. I couldn't help but notice it today.

It has been less than 2 months -- 2 month! Apparently, there was little news today. How can there be no news? There obviously wasn't any news, because the Examiner felt it necessary to put a dejected photo of President Obama on the cover and pretty much announce his time has come and gone.

Inside, they have a four-page spread of what they called, "Commentary: Special Report," which consisted of eight editorials explaining how our new president is "Stumbling along the learning curve," and that the "AIG mess clips the wings of high-flying Obama team." Obamaland will consist of long unemployment lines and skyrocketing prices, according to this bunch.

I don't agree with everything about Obama, but I believe in giving him a chance. This is plainly Ann Coulter journalism--saying derisive, hateful things to sell newspapers. Unbelievable! Whenever I go into a bookstore and see one of Ann Coulter's books on display, I hide it behind another book, usually something by Al Franken. I'd appreciate it if you would too.

I did have to look at this paper today to write this post, but I was happy to see the newspaper bin nearly full of these papers on my commute home tonight. You can't give them away. I wouldn't wipe myself with this paper.

Everyone Turns Gay, World to End, News at 11

Yesterday, some wing nuts in Minnesota said they would introduce anti-gay legislation to prevent gay marriage, civil unions, and unintended glances in locker rooms. Their worry is that if everyone turned gay, the world would end in 10 years. I say, maybe this is true, but what a fun 10 years that would be!

Apparently, they feel God’s damnation of gays would end the world. Let’s face it, this would not be the first time God has been pissed and wiped out humanity (minus an ark full of couples). God can be a bit judgmental, if history is any indication.

My question is, isn’t God often depicted as a man? Doesn’t the bible say that man was made in God’s image? Therefore, it seems to me all these men proclaiming their love for God are acting fairly gay.

I always thought Jesus was a little gay. He never got married, and he hung around at the beach picking up a dozen or so men. If I went to the beach and had a dozen men wanting to wash my feet, I’m not sure I’d be going around bashing the gays.

I don’t remember anything in my Sunday School lessons about Jesus commenting on the gays. Was it Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell? Maybe it just wasn’t that high on his agenda. Maybe his message of love and kindness is lost on the people that worship him. What makes me mad is that people get angry when I suggest that Jesus might have been gay, like that is a big insult. I consider it a compliment. Though I don’t believe in God, if there was a Jesus, I don’t think he would care if I thought he was gay in a hopeful way.

100 Facts About Me -- How My Father Died

In my recent post listing the 100 Facts About Me, I said that I would expand on the details of some of the facts on my list. Number 2 on the list was the following: "My father died when I was 1 year old in a skydiving accident (where he drowned)."

OK. Technically, that isn't even about me, but it was an important fact in my life. My father died when I was 18 months old. The last time I saw him, I was 9 months old. He was as Staff Sergeant in the Army and in the summer of 1962 he went to Southeast Asia for what was suppose to be a year tour.

In February 1963, my father was playing in a charity soccer match in Bangkok and the team was supposed to parachute onto the field. According to my mother, she had no idea that he was involved in parachuting. She said that he would get dizzy sitting in a rocking chair. Unfortunately, while skydiving he veered off-course and landed in a nearby canal. A helicopter was dispatched to rescue him, but he fell from the ladder beneath the helicopter back into the water and he drowned. He was 27 years old.

The photo above is of my parent's wedding photo taken in 1956.

I Spotted a Celebrity on the Subway!

On this morning's ride in to work, I happened to see a minor celebrity
on the subway. Sitting in front of the Chevron ad about using less
energy, is the model used in the ad. I'm not sure of this guy's name,
but what an inventive campaign by this company to hire models to bring
their ads to life by hiring the actual models to go around and sit
near their ads. I know I will now start using less energy. Isn't
Chevon already preaching to the choir by putting this ad on mass
transit? Perhaps they should be targeting the thousands of millions
clogging up the highways in their Hummers.