New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #241

The above cartoon is the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #241. This week, instead of just one caption, I thought I would post a bunch of captions. Let me know if you come up with any captions too. Which one (if any) should I enter into the contest? Click on the link above to enter.

1. And you thought the polar bear was a ridiculous plot twist.

2. Let's face it--this island was way too small for 48 people anyway.

3. But we both agreed having a pet was too much responsibility.

4. Mother told me marrying a shark dentist would get me nowhere.

5. I'm sure this situation would make an interesting allegory, Betty, but that's not my concern right now.

6. He doesn't seem to like to eat girls.

7. Larry, he may be a killing machine, but he's my killing machine!

8. I realize he's a shark, Larry, but he's also my accountant and a damn good one!

9. On the bright side, at least we don't have to worry about the tiger killing us anymore.

10. I think it's safe now Larry. Eating the lower half of your body seemed to fill him up.

11. Sorry Larry. They call it Survivor for a reason.

12. I told you a million times not to make fun of Sharky's overbite.

13. Things took a curious turn for the worse on final episode of Gilligan's Island.

14. Do I smell chum on your breath?

15. Larry, why don't you tell the shark about the one that got away?

Ted's Bulletin--New Restaurant on Capitol Hill

After running a 10K race today, Shane and I had lunch at Ted's Bulletin on Captiol Hill Barrack's Row.  It's a new restaurant that has just been open for 8 days. 

We both had a burger and a chocolate milkshake.  I loved my milkshake, but Shane was disappointed.  He thought it tasted like it was make with Hershey's syrup. 

Although it said on the menu that they serve breakfast anytime, they didn't have breakfast available.  It is a diner and they weren't serving breakfast.  They explained their goal is to have breakfast anytime, but they aren't there yet. 

The burgers were good, but the cost of two burgers with milkshakes and tip was $45.  Not exactly diner prices.  We'll try it again though eventually. 

The photos above are from their Web site.  It wasn't empty when we were there.  It was full with people waiting to get in.

Running the Capitol Hill Classic 10K

Today was the 31st running of the Capitol Hill Classic 10K race.  The race benefits the Capitol Hill Cluster School, a DC public school serving about 1,000 students from pre-school through 8th grade.

My goal was to finish in less than 50 minutes.  My clock time was 50 minutes and 15 seconds, but my net time was 49 minutes and 19 seconds, with an average of a 7 minute 57 second mile.  Of the 1,135 men that ran the race, I came in 378th.  In my age range (45-49 year olds), I came in 33rd out of 94 racers.  For some reason they divide the results into men and women separately.  There were many woman who beat me also, but I have way of knowing how I ranked overall among both sexes.

Running with Blue Shirt

 I was very happy with my results.  It was a perfect day for a race.  It wasn't too warm or too cool or too humid.  The toughest part of that race is running up Capitol Hill.  It comes in the last mile of the race and it is a bitch.  I could have used my blue sponge.  I was struggling.  Anyway, I made it up the hill and was able to recover enough to sprint the last few blocks to the finish.

Interestingly (to me at least), I ran this same race 2 years ago with a net time of 50 minutes 17 seconds.  I'm 2 years older and almost a minute faster.  It isn't a huge improvement, but it is better than getting worse.

Catch the Wind by Donovan

Progress on Same-Sex Benefits for Feds?

The Washington Blade reported recently that Congresswoman Tammy Baldwin (D-Wis) has received data on how the Government will pay for providing domestic partner benefits to Federal workers. The cost of such legislation would be approximately $63 million and it can't move forward unless the funds to pay for it are found.

Baldwin, the bill's sponsor, said they can pay for it, so it will meet "pay-go" requirements.

The bill, would make available to the same-sex partners of Feds the same benefits to the spouses of straight workers, including health and pension benefits.

This kind of legislation would mean our healthcare would be cheaper, we may be able to retire earlier if I can put Shane on my health benefits, and, if I die, Shane will be able to get my retirement pension.  It would be very good news.

Dead or Alive?--A Sponge-Worthy Web Site

Ever get into a violent argument over whether a certain celebrity is dead or alive?  I know I have.  Here's the solution to this horrible problem.  It's the Web site Dead or Alive?

This Web site currently lists 7,821 famous (and semi-famous) people from various walks of life --entertainment, politics, sports, music, law, ... and others.  But that's not all!  In addition to the search engine where you can look up the person you are wondering still breathes, there are various lists, such as a list of celebrities that have died in the last 6 months in reverse chronological order.  Currently, Lena Horne is on the top of the list.  


Wait!  There's even more cool stuff here... Here's a partial list (with links that are iffy) of more stuff on this site.


Birthdays Today
Died on this Date
Died Before Age 30
People Alive Over 85
Lived to 100
By Sex
By Cause of Death
Random Name
Dead or Alive Quizzes
Put 'em In Order Quizzes
Guess the Age Quiz
Who Have You Outlived?

SNL Announces Next Season's Hosts

With the amazing success of 88-year-old Betty White hosting the recent episode of Saturday Night Live, the show, which likes to stick to a winning formula, has already announced a number of hosts for next season.

Obviously Carol Burnett was being considered since there was a new Facebood campaign, but the producer deemed her much too young and hip for the show. Producer Lorne Michaels stated Ms. Burnett might be ready to host in 8 to 10 more years.

Here are next year's hosts for the first 10 shows, if they are still alive by their air date. You might notice the new minimum age to host is 85.

Princess Zsa Zsa Gabor

Carol Channing

Doris Day

Jean Stapleton

Rose Marie

Lauren Bacall

Elaine Stritch

Phyllis Diller

News Legend Helen Thomas

and

Titantic Star Gloria Stuart

62 Tips for a Happy Life -- Wisdom for Your Brain

Since it's commencement time and people may be looking for advice to dole out to graduating students, I thought I would list advice I think, if followed, could lead to a happy life. Please feel free to add more tips in the comments.

• Make a list of what you need to accomplish today.
• Throughout your life develop 5 short-term (do this year) and 5 long-term goals (do this decade) and work toward them every day.
• Make a list of 100 things you want to do or places you want to go before you die.
• Don’t depend on anyone and never blame others.
• Pay off your credit card bill each month.
• Don’t be too lazy. It gets old.
• Take some chances or life will be really dull.
• Don’t risk your life too often, as you may eventually die.
• Go to the doctor regularly (including the dentist).
• Listen to people when they talk.
• Ask questions, but don’t be a pest.
• Help others often.
• Treat yourself when you deserve it.
• Be reliable – Do what you say you are going to do.
• Brush your teeth and floss.
• Wear sunscreen.
• Be nice to everyone, even if you don’t like them.
• Live within your budget.
• Save some money.
• Learn new things all your life.
• Try to appreciate what you have.
• Try to appreciate beautiful things.
• Have good manners.
• Don’t feel the need to be superior to others.
• Laugh a lot.
• Read.
• Wear comfortable shoes.
• Give people a second chance.
• Be strong and fight when you have to fight.
• Watch the news and be aware of current events.
• Listen to all kinds of music.
• Take help when you need it.
• Don’t dwell on your fears and troubles so much.
• Even if you hate your job, make the best of it. Work on finding a better job, but you’ll probably hate that one too.
• Pay your bills on-time – late fees are a bitch.
• Be decisive. Think about what is the best decision and stick with it unless you are clearly wrong.
• Admit when you are wrong.
• Take pictures and keep them organized.
• Don’t brag too much no matter how great you are.
• Be honest.
• Don’t be afraid to make a fool of yourself once in a while.
• Find something that interests you and become an expert on it.
• Don’t get fat. Exercise.
• Don’t be depressing. Work on having a positive attitude.
• Make lots of friends.
• Keep your appearance up and keep clean.
• Give thoughtful gifts.
• Get enough sleep.
• Keep a blog or a diary of the events of your life.
• Don’t worry about not making everyone happy or what others will think. It usually won’t matter that much to them.
• Take a vacation from the TV (and computer).
• Get rid of stuff you don’t need or want. Don’t be a hoarder.
• Keep your house clean. Hire maids if you can afford it.
• If at all possible, have a pet and take good care of it. Don’t have more than 4.
• Always have something to look forward to.
• Create something.
• Assess your faults and try and correct them.
• Learn to do something interesting—a magic trick, a quirky talent, or something unique.
• Be prepared for emergencies and try to always remain calm.
• Never quit your job unless you have another job lined up.
• Don’t waste your money buying lottery tickets.
• Don’t waste your time with people you don’t like or who treat you badly.

Amazing Princess Bride DVD Cover

The 25th Anniverssary Collector's Edition of the DVD for The Princess Bride didn't seem all that exciting to me at first, but take note of the writing on the cover.  How do they do it?

The New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #240

Al, it isn't necessary to always point out

the one that is most anatomically correct.

The above cartoon is the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #240. Let me know if you come up with any captions too. Click on the link above to enter.

Happy Mother's Day Mom

I am visiting my Mom for Mother's Day and found this photo of us from the spring of 1969.  We are at Winterthur Museum in Delaware in the Azaleas Woods.  I was in the second grade (7 years old).  Mom said she thinks she made that dress.  Happy Mother's Day Mom! 

Poll of Broadway Tony Nomination Snubs

Broadway.com is doing a poll about which Tony Nomination snub was most upsetting.  Below is their list of Broadway snubs.  I haven't seen The Addams Family, but I love Nathan Lane and think he should always be nominated.  Also, with all the nominations it did get, it is a bit surprising that Promises, Promises didn't get a nom. Take part in their poll to see the results.

JOHN GALLAGHER JR., AMERICAN IDIOT (BEST ACTOR IN A MUSICAL)

PROMISES, PROMISES (BEST REVIVAL OF A MUSICAL)

BEBE NEUWIRTH, THE ADDAMS FAMILY (BEST ACTRESS IN A MUSICAL)

NORBERT LEO BUTZ, ENRON (BEST ACTOR IN A PLAY)

HUGH JACKMAN, A STEADY RAIN (BEST ACTOR IN A PLAY)

MICHAEL MAYER, AMERICAN IDIOT (BEST DIRECTION OF A MUSICAL)

CHEYENNE JACKSON, FINIAN'S RAINBOW (BEST ACTOR IN A MUSICAL)

ENRON (BEST PLAY)

KRISTIN CHENOWETH, PROMISES, PROMISES (BEST ACTRESS IN A MUSICAL)

NATHAN LANE, THE ADDAMS FAMILY (BEST ACTOR IN A MUSICAL)

DANIEL CRAIG, A STEADY RAIN (BEST ACTOR IN A PLAY)

THE ADDAMS FAMILY (BEST MUSICAL)

SONDHEIM ON SONDHEIM (BEST MUSICAL)

RACE (BEST PLAY)

COME FLY AWAY (BEST MUSICAL)

Taking In Another Nats Game

Taken from Section 315. The Nats are playing the Marlins and ahead in the first inning! Go Nats!!

Update:  The Nats played a good game, but ended up losing 4-2.

Follow My Blog and Win a Prize... Maybe

In a blatant attempt to get more Followers, I've started giving away bribes... I mean prizes. This month, I will randomly select one of the people officially "Following" my blog as a "Follower" to win a "valuable" prize.  The prize is a Running With Blue Sponge T-Shirt.  The prize drawing will occur on the last day of the month.  I'll alert the winner that his or her dream has finally come true.  This stunt might have something to do with my New Year's Resolution of increasing my number of Followers.  It would be nice to actually accomplish one of those things.

*Note:  If you are already a Follower you are already entered.  You just have to Follow once and you are entered for this and all future giveaways.  Good Luck!

Why We Feared Russians During the Cold War

You may remember I posted the video of the Russian singer a few months back (check it out here).  Well, I saw on a new blog, Mikes's Short Attention Span Theater, the story behind that video and a re-edit  that is even funnier than the original. Genius!

EW's 20 Most Shocking TV Deaths List Incomplete

I love a good list and Entertainment Weekly's list of the 20  Most Shocking TV Deaths has some good ones (Adriana, played by Drea de Matteo, from The Sopranos was one of the best) and some lame ones (Kenny from South Park, really?). 

However, a major omission from their list was one of the most shocking deaths of a major TV character I can remember.  Lt. Col. Henry Blake, played by McLean Stevenson, died offscreen at the end of the third season of MASH.  Stevenson asked to be released from his contract.  The show's writers reluctantly penned him an exit in the final episode of the 1974-75 season, in which Lt. Col. Blake was discharged, only to board a plane that was shot down over the Sea of Japan, killing everyone on board (a development added after scripts were distributed so the show's actors would display genuine emotion as if they had been truly unaware of that part of the storyline).

It was quite a shocker, because they just didn't kill off major characters in TV shows back in the 1970s and nobody had any idea it was going to happen.  How could EW leave that out?

Click here to see the (in)complete list.

5 on the Fifth -- My Journey Home from Work

This is an idea from State of the Nation UK -- taking five photos around the fifth of the month and share them with the world.  The theme this time around was a Journey, so I did a photo essay of my commute home from work.  These were all taken on May 4, 2010.  My commute is about 25 minutes, door to door, depending on how long I have to wait for trains.

Outside the Pentagon City Metro (subway) Station,

which is across the street from where I work.

Here comes my train.

Crossing the Potomac River on the DC 

Metro with a view of another bridge.  

Outside of Eastern Market Metro, 

about 2 blocks from my home.

Home again, home again, jiggity jig.

Use of Tazer on Phillies Fan Shocking

Though this AP photo is an amazing shot, there is no reason police should be using tazers to apprehend a kid running around a baseball field.  He was not a threat to anyone.  The ending of the movie Fever Pitch would of been quite different in Philadelphia.  In that film, Drew Barrymore runs across Fenway Park to get to Jimmy Fallon, to prevent him from selling his valuable season tickets and they then have a romantic moment before her arrest.  She would have just been twitching in center field had it happened in Philly. 

Tony Award Nominations Announced Today

Fela! and revivial of La Cage aux Folles got the most nominations this year with 11 each.  The revivial of the play, Fences, was next with 10 nominations.  Here are the major Tony Award Nominations announced today:

Best Play
In the Next Room or the Vibrator Play
Next Fall
Red
Time Stands Still

Best Musical
American Idiot
Fela!
Memphis
Million Dollar Quartet

Best Original Score (Music and/or Lyrics) Written for the Theatre
The Addams Family
Enron
Fences
Memphis

Best Revival of a Play
Fences
Lend Me a Tenor
The Royal Family
A View from the Bridge

Best Revival of a Musical
Finian's Rainbow
La Cage aux Folles
A Little Night Music
Ragtime

Best Performance by a Leading Actor in a Play
Jude Law in Hamlet
Alfred Molina in Red
Liev Schreiber in A View from the Bridge
Christopher Walken in A Behanding in Spokane
Denzel Washington in Fences

Best Performance by a Leading Actress in a Play
Viola Davis in Fences
Valerie Harper in Looped
Linda Lavin in Collected Stories
Laura Linney in Time Stands Still
Jan Maxwell in The Royal Family

Best Performance by a Leading Actor in a Musical
Kelsey Grammer in La Cage aux Folles
Sean Hayes in Promises, Promises
Douglas Hodge in La Cage aux Folles
Chad Kimball in Memphis
Sahr Ngaujah in Fela!

Best Performance by a Leading Actress in a Musical
Kate Baldwin in Finian's Rainbow
Sherie Rene Scott in Everyday Rapture
Montego Glover in Memphis
Christiane Noll in Ragtime
Catherine Zeta-Jones in A Little Night Music

Best Performance by a Featured Actor in a Play
David Alan Grier in Race
Stephen McKinley Henderson in Fences
Jon Michael Hill in Superior Donuts
Stephen Kunken in Enron
Eddie Redmayne in Red

Best Performance by a Featured Actress in a Play
Maria Dizzia in In the Next Room or the Vibrator Play
Rosemary Harris in The Royal Family
Jessica Hecht in A View from the Bridge
Scarlett Johansson in A View from the Bridge
Jan Maxwell in Lend Me a Tenor

Best Performance by a Featured Actor in a Musical
Kevin Chamberlin in The Addams Family
Robin De Jesús in La Cage aux Folles
Christopher Fitzgerald in Finian's Rainbow
Levi Kreis in Million Dollar Quartet
Bobby Steggert in Ragtime

Best Performance by a Featured Actress in a Musical
Barbara Cook in Sondheim on Sondheim
Katie Finneran in Promises, Promises
Angela Lansbury in A Little Night Music
Karine Plantadit in Come Fly Away
Lillias White in Fela!

Click here for the complete list of nominations.

Pass On the Salt -- Wisdom for Your Brain

I thought I would start providing some tips on improving your (and my) health.  John Tesh has a syndicated radio show where he provides "Intelligence for Your Life."  So here is my version I call, "Wisdom for Your Brain." 

The first one is about sodium. As someone who has had heart disease galore in their family tree, salt is something I should think about as I get older. 

Generally, 1.5 teaspoons of salt a day is sufficient to obtain the recommended 3,000 milligrams of sodium. However, the average American ingests two to four times that much each day. Too much salt in the diet causes extra water to be drawn into the blood vessels. This increases the pressure on the artery walls, causing high blood pressure.

According to today's Express newspaper, extra salt can be hiding in foods you may not think would have much salt.  Salt solutions are pumped into chicken parts to plump them up.  That can add 60 mg of sodium to one chicken breast.  Also, there is lots of sodium in some breakfast cereals.  A big bowl of corn flakes (2 cups) has 532 mg sodium. 

Another surprise for me was cottage cheese.  It has 918 mg of sodium per cup!  Now I'm glad I don't like the stuff. 

If you eat a lot of frozen dinners, they are usually jammed full of sodium.  Check labels and watch to see if the foods you eat are loaded with extra salt.  Also, add salt to your food sparingly.  Use more pepper or try other non-sodium seasonings that flavor foods that won't kill you in the long run (or make this one).