New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #304

Don't let those TSA agents give you any guff.

This is my idea for the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #304.  Let me know if you have any ideas for a caption too.  

Training Update for the Philadelphia Marathon

I am still on track (no pun intended) for my training of the Philadelphia Marathon in November. Today, I ran 18 miles in just over 3 hours.  I went from my house near Eastern Market on Capitol Hill across the National Mall to the Potomac River to the Georgetown waterfront and then up the Capitol Crescent Trail to the Montgomery County, MD, line.  It was about 9 miles one way.  I ran it up and back.

Today's weather was very cool (high 40s and low 50s).  This was a much better run for me than last week.  Last Sunday was warm and humid.  I ran about 3 miles less than today, but much slower than today's time.  I actually walked a good bit of the way back last week.  I felt so much better today.  I hardly walked at all today.  It made me feel much more confident that I'll be ready for the marathon the Sunday before Thanksgiving.

Another thing that made the run go better was that I actually ran with my blue sponge.  I love that sponge.  We had some rain showers this morning, and my sponge came in handy to wipe the water off my glasses.  It also helps keep the sweat out of my eyes.  I highly recommend running with a sponge.

Top 10 Bad Ideas for Your Personal Blog

I was surfing for ideas to spice up by blog on the Internets and decided to come up with a list of bad ideas for other bloggers looking for something to do for their own blogs.  Do not do these things.  They are bad ideas.

TOP 10 BAD IDEAS FOR YOUR PERSONAL BLOG

10. Transcribe that college term paper on the history of thimbles you got the C on.

9. Write a suicide note as a funny joke.

8. Post pictures of how you torture your cat.

7. List things you don’t like about your spouse in bed.

6. Take pictures of the food you eat and what it looks like when it comes out.

5. Rate your friends from most to least attractive and smartest to dumbest.

4. Explain why your boss is a jerk and why you should be running things. 

3. Do a photo essay of your vacation to Omaha.

2. Write a summary of interesting facts about yourself like your Social Security number, mother’s maiden name, birth date, bank account numbers, credit card numbers, and passwords to all your accounts.

And the #1 Bad Idea for Personal Blog, 

Post the photos from the hidden camera in your guest bathroom.

Congrats to New Gay Dad Congressman Jared Polis

Gay Congressman Jared Polis (on the right above) and his partner, Marlon Reis (left), announced today the birth of their son Caspian Julius.  The birth announcement reported Caspian weighed 8 pounds and 12 ounces.  Democratic Congressman Polis of Colorado is one of four out members of the the U.S. Congress.  Congratulations!

Debit Card Fee Means Goodbye Bank of America

Bank of America has been my bank for many years, but the newly announced debit card fees are the last straw.  It is going to be a pain in the butt to change banks, however.  I have a lot of automatic payments and online bills paid through Bank of America.  Even though the new fee amounts to about $5 a month, I've had enough of this bank.  We got a BofA loan when we bought our foreclosure in Florida, and they were horrible to deal with.  There are plenty of other banks out there that have free debit cards.  I don't need to be nickel and dimed by these bastards anymore.

Scenes from an Italian Restaurant-Lavagna

Tonight, Shane and I had dinner at one of the newest restaurants on 8th Street (Barracks Row) near Eastern Market on Capitol Hill.  It is Lavagna, which in Italian apparently means chalkboard.  They use chalk slates for their menus.

This was actually the third time we've eaten there.  They have very delicious home-made pastas.  The first two times I had the spaghetti and meatballs, but tonight I had the Fettuccine Bolognese (pictured below).  It looked a little Hamburger Helper, but it was good.  I do think I liked the spaghetti better though.  Shane had what he has had each time we have gone to Lavagna, the Rigatoni with Italian Sausage in Vodka Sauce.  We are liking this place.

As far as the calorie count for this meal, I have no idea.  As you can see from yesterday's post, I am dieting as part of my Biggest Loser competition at work.  However, I will say that I did run 8 miles on the treadmill today and am planning on a 16 mile run this weekend, so I can afford to load up on a few carbs.

Just in case you were looking for the Billy Joel video while searching on the Internet, it is below. I like that song too.

Trying to Become the Biggest Loser

They recently started a Biggest Loser contest at work, so I thought it might motivate me to lose those 20 pounds I've been trying to get rid of for years.  We had our first weigh-in last Wednesday and this is Week #2.  There are about 10 contestants.  We each put in $20 and after 10 weeks, the person who has lost the most percentage of weight wins $140.  Second place gets $40 and third place gets $20. 

Thanks to a little quick and dirty photoshopping, here is what my weigh-in might look like if I was actually on the TV show.  Though that is my head, I wish it were actually my body.  The numbers below are correct.  I lost 4.5 pounds from my first week. I was pretty happy about that. 



DNC Campaign Video: "Not One Candidate"

This makes Republicans out as horrible, heartless people.  Oh... right... Never mind.

Taunting the Talking Dog with Food Stories

Talking Dog Loves to Talk - watch more funny videos

Another Possible Government Shutdown Looms

As Ronald Reagan once said, "There you go again."  For the third time this year, there is another possibility that the Congress will not be able to fund the U.S. Government. If there is no compromise by October 1, Federal employees like myself are unemployed.

The latest is that the House GOP has passed a bill that is guaranteed not to pass the Senate. Democrats want a larger disaster relief with no offsetting spending cuts. Teabag Republicans (and they seem to be the only ones with any power) want smaller disaster relief spending with spending offset by cuts to programs, such as job-creating programs.

Dems say linking spending cuts to disaster aid is unprecedented and unfair. The result is gridlock and a big dramatic showdown where everyone is sick of all the crap going on.  Last time, it looked pretty certain that a shutdown was going to happen only to be avoided at the very last minute.  Who knows this time?  It is REALLY getting old. Really.

Wanda Sykes Reveals She Has Breast Cancer

I have always been a big fan of Wanda Sykes.  She is a funny lady, even when talking about her bout with breast cancer this year.  On why she didn't talk about it earlier, she said, "I'm black... I'm Lesbian... I can't be the poster child for everything!" See the clip from Ellen here.  Sorry for the ad. Also, the clip has some gaps, but that is the way it is.

Dr. Oz Features Woman Dying to Be the Fattest

Yesterday's Dr. Oz program featured Susanne Eman, a crazy lady from Arizona that is trying to become the fattest woman on Earth.  She doesn't seem to be all there mentally. 

The clips (parts 2-5 are available once you click on the link below) feature the interview and some revealing photos of Ms. Eman.  It also features the men who seem to be encouraging her to get fatter, since they have sexual fetishes for fat women.

As Dr. Oz says, it is all very shocking. I don't like to judge, but she is killing herself in front of her kids eyes.  Like the train wreck that she is, it is all very sad.

Dying to be the Fattest Woman, Pt 1

In other news, they started a "Biggest Loser" contest at work on Wednesday.  Everyone who wants to participate puts in $20, and after 10 weeks, the person who loses the largest percentage of weight wins.  The pot for first place is $140! 

I did go out to dinner last night with my sister-in-law, Laurie.  She forced me to get Mexican and I was pretty bad (though the food was good), but I'm hoping to run it off.  It was worth it.  Laurie is lots of fun and we had a great time.  Thanks for dinner Laurie!!!

Farewell REM-Furry Happy Monsters

REM announced on their Web site that the band is breaking up after more than 30 years.   I thought, in tribute, I would choose one of my favorite REM songs to post.  I realize I have previously posted this, but I loved this clip.  Hope you like it too.  Farewell REM.

Murder by Georgia of Troy Davis On Hold

As I write this, the Georgia-sponsored murder of Troy Davis is on hold pending a decision from the U.S. Supreme Court.  Although seven of nine witness recanted their testimony, the state of Georgia is determined to move forward with the execution despite real doubts of Mr. Davis's guilt.

I find it amazing that people who think the government is incapable performing the most basic of services should have the capability to make life and death decisions.  Obviously, mistakes will be made and finding out after the accused is executed is a hard boo boo to rectify.

While it takes decades of expensive legal battles to actually enforce an execution, the alternate penalty of life in prison with no chance of release seems a more horrible penalty.  People who commit horrible crimes should live long horrible lives.

UPDATE: At 11:08 p.m. on Wednesday night, the murder was accomplished.

Happier News--DADT Is History!

The Don't Ask, Don't Tell law was officially over starting today!  Gays and lesbians can now serve openly in the U.S. Military.  Below is a video I saw posted on the Maybe It's Just Me blog.  It shows a soldier calling his dad to tell him he is gay.  It brought back memories of my own coming out.  What is even more interesting (and amazing in a good way)  is that at the end, he tells his dad that everyone he serves with knows he is gay and it is not a problem.

14-Year-Old Bullying Victim Dead-Had Made "It Gets Better" Video

I saw the following story on the Joe. My. God. blog.  It is unbelievably sad, but it needs to be told. 

Heartbroken Buffalo, NY, parents Tracy and Tim Rodemeyer say they found their 14 year-old son Jamey dead yesterday morning in a presumed suicide. Jamey had long complained of vicious homophobic bullying at the hands of his classmates.

Jamey Rodemeyer needed help. At 14, he was grappling with adolescent demons that could torment grown men. And when he was online, he wrote about it. "I always say how bullied I am, but no one listens," he wrote Sept. 9. "What do I have to do so people will listen to me?" Just over one week later, Jamey was found dead outside his home of an apparent suicide. In the months prior, he routinely blogged about school bullying and thoughts of suicide in between upbeat posts about his pop star idol Lady Gaga and the ordinary types of teen rants typical for kids his age. On Sept. 8, he wrote: "No one in my school cares about preventing suicide, while you're the ones calling me [gay slur] and tearing me down."

Much of Jamey's tormenting came via cyber-bullying. His parents, who say they discussed and supported Jamey's questioning of his sexuality, intend to carry on his campaign against bullies.

VIDEO: Jamey actually recorded an "It Gets Better" clip back in May.

New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #303

Since we're firmly anti-gun, we got it for self-defense.


You know it goes well with your French Country decor.


I can't resist anything on that Home Shopping Channel.

These are my ideas for the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #303.  Let me know if you have any ideas for a caption too.  

Yet Another Where In the World Is Shane?

OK.  I will provide a hint to help you guess where in the world Shane went this time on his business trip.  It is not in Egypt, or anywhere in Africa.  I thought the pyramid might throw you off.  As usual, the first correct guesser wins a prize that could be worth millions.  Good Luck!

UPDATE:  Joey was the first person to correctly guess Las Vegas as where Shane is in the world.  He wins the prize that could be worth millions.  It is a MegaMillion Lottery ticket, which I will hold and check to see if it is a winner.  If it is, I'll forward it to Joey.  Don't start spending it yet Joey.  Kudos also to Walt, who correctly figured out which hotel Shane was at.  He would have gotten extra credit if he came up with a room number.

Blue Sponge TV Emmy Award Predictions

Below are my predictions for the major categories of the Television Emmy Awards being broadcast Sunday.  

1. BEST DRAMA SERIES:

• Boardwalk Empire
• Dexter
• Friday Night Lights
• Game of Thrones
• The Good Wife
• Mad Men

This is a tough category for me, because I don't watch any of these shows.  I saw the first couple episodes of Boardwalk Empire.  It was OK, but I didn't really keep up.  I do like Steve Buscemi though... not so much in this show, but he was amazing in the movie, Fargo.  

2. BEST COMEDY SERIES:

Modern Family cast

• The Big Bang Theory
• Glee
• Modern Family
• The Office
• Parks and Recreation
• 30 Rock


This is also a tough category, because I like several of these shows.   Normally, I would pick 30 Rock, but I didn't like it as much last year as Modern Family.  It kept up the quality in its sophomore year. 

3. BEST DRAMA SERIES ACTRESS:

Kathy Bates

• Kathy Bates ("Harry's Law")
• Connie Britton ("FNL")
• Mirella Enos ("The Killing")
• Mariska Hargitay ("L&O:SVU")
• Julianna Margulies ("The Good Wife")
• Elisabeth Moss ("Mad Men")

I did watch several episodes of Harry's Law, and I thought it was not so good.  I do love Kathy Bates though and I don't know anything about the other shows. 

4. BEST DRAMA ACTOR:

Steve Buscemi

• Steve Buscemi ("Boardwalk Empire")
• Kyle Chandler ("FNL")
• Michael C. Hall ("Dexter")
• Jon Hamm ("Mad Men")
• Hugh Laurie ("House")
• Timothy Olyphant ("Justified")

This is just because I like Steve Buscemi.  I used to love Michael C. Hall on Six Feet Under also.

5. BEST COMEDY ACTRESS:

Laura Linney

• Edie Falco ("Nurse Jackie")
• Tina Fey ("30 Rock")
• Laura Linney ("The Big C")
• Melissa McCarthy ("Mike & Molly")
• Martha Plimpton ("Raising Hope")
• Amy Poehler ("Parks and Recreation")

This was also a tough call because I like four of these nominees.  Shane is rooting for Martha Plimpton, but I think Laura Linney is amazing in the Big C, just like most things she is in.  It isn't really a situation comedy in the traditional sense, so she probably won't win.  She should though.  I also love Edie Falco in Nurse Jackie and Tina Fey in 30 Rock.

6. BEST COMEDY ACTOR:

Louis C.K.

• Alec Baldwin ("30 Rock")
• Louis C.K. ("Louie")
• Steve Carell ("The Office")
• Johnny Galecki ("Big Bang Theory")
• Matt LeBlanc ("Episodes")
• Jim Parsons ("Big Bang Theory")

Of course Alec Baldwin will probably win again, but Louis C.K. deserves to win for Louie.  There is an amazing scene where a police officer who has just saved his life asks Louie to kiss him to show his gratitude.   I thought it was one of the best things on.  

7. BEST MOVIE/MINISERIES:

Downton Abbey

• Cinema Verite
• Downton Abbey
• The Kennedys
• Mildred Pierce
• The Pillars of the Earth
• Too Big to Fail

Downton Abbey is the only one of these I watched.  It was really good.  

I am usually wrong about these things more than half the time, but so what.  Who cares?  Who do you think deserves to win?

Curb Your Enthusiasm Features Gayest Kid Ever

I love this show!  Larry is the only one who is completely non-judgemental about him.  He is very supportive in fact!