Sweetie, you don't always win by finishing first.
I need my oil checked. Where's your dip stick?
Fasten your seatbelt, it's going to be a bumpy night.
I never met anyone with a dual exhaust. It's kind of gross.
Will you please stop calling them headlights?
This is the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest #248. Above are my suggested captions. Which one should I enter, if any? Let me know if you have any captions too.